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Kitten on the Moon (bonus track)

from Angel with a Sword by Leslie Fish

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    Features artwork by Tineke Lemmens.

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about

© Leslie Fish, 2006

lyrics

A tourist came to Luna Base, and he brought along his cat.
She charmed everybody there in just two hours flat.
A little half-grown Siamese, who loved to pounce and play:
The crew paid off her human just to make sure she could stay.

(Chorus) Oh, that kitten on the moon! Kitten on the moon!
You ought to see her pounce, that kitten on the moon.

Now kitty loved that moon base, and the lower gravity.
She learned to stalk, and run, and leap, and pounce in one-sixth G.
She grew to be an expert at caroming off the wall.
The crew made big bucks selling vids of kitty playing ball.

Then up came a bunch of terrorists, yelling: “Alla-walla-yabba-dabba-do!”
Meaning: “We’re gonna blow the whole place up. Don’t care if we die too.”
They never noticed kitty-cat lying on the overhead pipe,
Until their boss walked underneath, and she gave a mighty swipe. Wowl!

Their boss-man yelled and jumped real hard, which wasn’t very smart.
He cracked his skull on the ceiling, which promptly stopped his heart.
His buddies hollered “Satan! Satan!” and tried to catch that cat,
But to run and jump in one-sixth G? They hadn’t trained for that. Not like—

So kitty led them a merry chase on the ceiling and the walls.
It became a 3-D pool game, with flapping, squawking balls.
The station crewmen spied their chance, and as each thug flew past
They grabbed and bopped and tied him up until they’d caught the last. Thanks to—

So they held the moon’s first trial, and the terrorists got the boot—
Straight out the nearest airlock, without benefit of suit.
But kitty was a hero, and the whole crew paid the bill
To ship up tanks for breeding fish so the cat could eat her fill.

(Last Chorus:)
So now there’s fishing on the moon!
Fishing on the moon!
Thanks to kitty-cat, there’s fishing on the moon.

credits

from Angel with a Sword, released September 2, 2022

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Leslie Fish Phoenix, Arizona

If there's one name that's practically synonymous with filk (Science Fiction folk music), it's Leslie Fish. Leslie has written literally hundreds of songs covering almost every subject, from the space program ("Hope Eyrie"), to Star Trek ("Banned From Argo") to urban life, history, and space fantasy ("Carmen Miranda's Ghost"). ... more

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